The Gift That Keeps On Giving

On January 8, 2010, my husband’s 43rd birthday, I presented him with our daughter. It was the best birthday present ever. After 4 days in the hospital before she was in even born (you can read about here if you have 7 or 8 free hours), I was like “Happy Birthday, Mother F’er!” He also got a very nice steak dinner right before we went into the hospital.

A month later on my birthday, after being stuck inside for a week because of 50 inches of snow and the aforementioned newborn daughter, he presented me with….. not a godd@mned thing.

At the time I was pissed. Did I mention how I had just given him a child! On his birthday!!!!?? But now I’ve come to terms with it and learned to only bring it up during the most extreme circumstances.

“I don’t feel like cooking tonight” I would rather play with our daughter, who I gave birth to on your birthday!. Maybe you could cook tonight?”

“I bought these shoes and yeah they were expensive but I figured since you didn’t get me anything for my birthday it would be OK. Hey, where is your birthday present? Sleeping like a little angel?”

“Honey, I know I said I would start cleaning out the litter box again once I stopped being pregnant, but boy, that major abdominal surgery I had to get your daughter out of me on your birthday has really made me tired. Could you be a sweetie and do it for me?

And so on and so on. So I’m left to wonder, did he actually give me a gift after all?”

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